<1>Trying to decide the right career for my parrot
Deeter and I
Perhaps you are like me and have a pet parrot.
Like most pet owners, you have taken a sort of parental role with your pet.
You wish your parrot to grow up someday, get a college education and then move on to a good job, to become a professional parrot.
This was my wish too but sadly it will not happen. Deeter, as he is called, seems more destined for some other less lucrative trade.
It’s not that he isn’t likable. Deeter can be as charming as the next person or parrot.
However today I discovered a serious personality flaw that will get him jail time should be become an accountant: he loves to shred paper.
It happened innocently. He was on my shoulder as I tried to balance my bank account. He swiftly climbed down my arm and yanked at my neat pile of bills, spilling them all over the floor.
Trying to distract him, I gave him a piece of useless scrap paper.
Ha! Do you think my bird is stupid?
He tossed it in my face and jumped back into the re-piled bills.
He was madly attacking a Indigo receipt and it dawned on me. He was not eating the paper: he was shredding it, all over me, the desk and the floor.
The only way I could get him to stop shredding was to give him an orange post-it note. He shredded it all over my shoulder.
Then he shrieked in my ear to let me know time to go the the bathroom. Laugh at your peril.
Now we are back. Can you imagine how hard it is to type with a parrot balanced on your finger. He is walking all over my keyboard and shredding a bank deposit. I wish he would shred some bills.
Maybe he will make a good lawyer. If they shred paper, don’t they claim solicitor client privilege?
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