Courtesy of Scott Adams, by way of Richi Jennings @richi
She has a bandage on her hand, my cousin Steve Pate has no marks
The Daily Mail is reporting Nicollette Sheridan got thrown from her horse. Again?
“Nicolette’s boyfriend Steve, a wealthy financier. looked equally dashing in a black suit with an open neck white shirt.”
“The trendy steak house appears to be a favourite of the couple – just two weeks ago the pair were also seen arriving for a spot of dinner.” (Daily Mail)
She’s been heavy dating my cousin Steve Pate for ages now that the horse accident story seems… well … a little old.
It’s a better excuse than Tiger Woods came up with for his SUV accident.
My aunt from Texas assured everyone on the family mailing list that Steve has no scars or bruises on his face.
Maybe Nicollette did hurt her hand falling off the horse.
Edie Britt on Desperate Housewives, Nicolle’s old role, was a man-eater not a man-beater.
We all breathed a sigh of relief that Steve wasn’t taking it on the chin, if you know what I mean.
Those movie stars can be high strung fillies and Steve’s just a good old boy from Texas.
Steve is used to gorgeous women in Texas, but he also knows you can’t tell a Texas woman nothin’.
Steve CANNOT get Nicollette to wear a riding helmet. That might have saved her head but not her little finger, which is the item of faîte du bandage as they French say. Continue reading
PEI celebrates the day with plagiarism, pontificating and prevarication
The world celebrates UN International Day of Persons with Disabilities. On Prince Edward Island, we can look forward to political hot air.
The appropriate minister will rise in the Legislature to acknowledge her love for and empathy with the situation of Islanders living with disabilities. Those speeches are fulsome, with profound words that puff up those who listen. In reality, they are hollow with pontificating and prevarication. Continue reading
We were very worried about him being so young and all.
One day I went to see him at home and asked him how he felt.
“Great,” he said. “I follow the doctor’s orders.”
“He said cut back to one beer a day.”
“So I switched to quarts, one in the daytime and one at night.”
He just celebrated his 86th birthday.
(dedicated to Chuck Arsenault, who after I told him my uncle’s true funny story realized he steal might abscond with it, Chuck being a better comedian than I)
Fare turns out to be dangerous criminal intent on no good but cool cabbie carries the day
This is a true story that happened last week. We have been asked to change the names and locations to protect the cabbie. You will understand why.
I’m sitting in my cab at Mall around Walmart yesterday morning [Friday] about 8:15 when this guy and girl can running over to my cab with a whole cart load of stuff, 42 inch LCD TV, computer and a bunch of other stuff.
I opened the back of my cab, put everything in, then they said they wanted to go to amhurst.
They said how much and I said $80.00. They said “Lets go.” Continue reading
The cat didn’t make it down the steps
First snow fell last night. The cat never made it to the steps. I wanted to go for a ride at 10 pm but everyone driving had bald tires and forgotten how slippery it gets.
It’s pretty outside but pretty limiting too. The cat will stay in and so will the wheelchair until the snow is gone. Those carefree summer days of heading out the front door are a memory until next spring. Maybe it will thaw on Tuesday.